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Transform Pain into Strength: Embrace Purpose, Find Freedom, and Cultivate Inner Peace

“You cannot put wisdom in their hearts. You can only put wisdom ON their hearts. When their hearts crack open, the wisdom will fall in.” - My Spiritual Director, Robert Brumet

There Is Wisdom in the Pain

I once believed my suffering held no value. Then someone asked me, “If you could erase all your experiences, but also lose all your wisdom, would you do it?” This question shifted my mindset profoundly. It made me realize that my pain has shaped the resilient woman I am today. The same is true for you.

Coping Is Healthy

In moments of overwhelming grief or pain, the urge to shut down is natural. Coping becomes essential. Yet, there's power in learning to sit with our pain, managing it in healthy ways.

How to Be with Pain in a Healthy Way

Life demands maintenance—chores, bills, work—keeping us comfortable. Similarly, managing emotional upkeep is crucial. Healthy coping skills like journaling, meditation, and connecting with trusted others provide essential spaces to process pain without being consumed by it.

Recognizing Unhealthy Coping

Coping turns harmful when our actions stray from our values. For instance, seeking temporary relief in unhealthy relationships or distractions rather than addressing underlying pain and aspirations.

Navigating Pain: How Long and When to Move Forward

The duration of sitting with pain varies for each person. While grief is natural, dwelling endlessly in sorrow doesn't serve our growth. Balance lies in embracing both sorrow and joy, finding peace in the middle way.

Sharing Pain

Personal history might urge us to hide our pain. Yet, there's profound value in sharing authentically with others who can hold space for our struggles. Journaling and meditation help clarify our intentions before sharing, ensuring our vulnerability is enriching rather than burdening our relationships.

Returning to Joy

Resilience emerges when we navigate pain mindfully. Embracing joy doesn't negate pain but honors its lessons, fostering strength and self-understanding. Remember, while pain is inevitable, suffering remains optional—an outcome of the stories we tell ourselves.


Exploring pain’s depths has unveiled profound wisdom. Through practices like journaling, meditation, and sharing with trusted confidants, I’ve transformed suffering into growth and resilience. Embrace life’s lessons in pain, guiding you towards a more authentic, fulfilling existence.

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